Thursday, May 20, 2010

final exam

eHow

1. How to throw a 65th surprise birthday party
Think about what the guest of honor would enjoy, but consider your other guests, as well. Have the bartender be a close friend of his, or even hire a celebrity. Don't make him feel old. Set out kid toys like firetrucks. Have fun!

2. How to Increase Bat Swing Speed
Squeeze a tennis ball 20 times in each hand. That's one rep; do 5 reps. This will greatly strengthen the hands and forearms. The result? Greater bat speed!

3. How to Write a Funny Facebook Status Message
Try typing out quotes from some funny show that you and your friends watch. ex: Spongebob- "I'm ready!" Or you could type an inside joke. You should get plenty of comments. Or simply take someone else's. Of course you should tweak it a little to make it your own.

4. How to Deny a Fart
Ease it out real slow like. If nobody hears it, you're in the clear. But if it slips out, continue with the conversation. Don't look obvious. Or ask them if they are feeling okay. They will become embarrassed after that. lastly, blame others.

5. How to Scratch a Leg in a Cast
Don't get poison ivy. Use a hair dryer set to cool and blow cold air into the cast. Use benadryl around your cast. Pinch the skin several times around the cast. Then rub it and this will distract the itch.

6. How to Use a Back Scratcher
Put it in the hand that allows you to reach your itch. Scratch up and down with the fingers facing you. Or use it to scratch someone else's back so you don't use your fingers.

7. How to Increase Your Chances of Winning the Lottery
Join or form a lottery-playing team. more people = more chances. Buy as many as you can afford. If you win, you have to split the profits

8. How to Break an Attacker's Nose
Stay balanced. Keep your arms up to protect your face. Hold your hand up with your fingers bent and together and your palm upright. Use your stronger hand. Smoke him in the face. Run!

9. How to Cure OCD
Realize you have a problem. Being OCD makes you angry when you can't make things perfect. When you are angry, try relieving your anger some other way. Hit a punching bag until all your anger has been released. No anger, no more OCD.

10. How to Relax
Take a pen and paper and write down everything that is stressing you out. Once you understand all your problems, you will be slightly relieved. Log off the internet, stop watching the news, and turn off your cell phone. Get away from it all and just enjoy the peace and quiet.


Dear Np Staff of the 2010-2011 school year, this is NOT an "easy-A-class." If you don't like writing, either transfer or suck it up because this class is loads of writing. But for all of you that enjoy writing, or are man enough to endure it, this class is lots of fun. You're around the entire staff every day, so you will make friends quick. The ones that are already your friend, you will become closer than ever before. Don't procrastinate with your stories because it WILL come back to haunt you. Enjoy y'all's year and happy blogging =]

If I was editor, I probably wouldn't be much different than Nathan. He was a great editor and the paper wouldn't have come together if it wasn't for him. He gave us ideas when we were lacking in the idea section of our brain. He read over our stories. He didn't do it for just correctness, but also gave us tips on how to make it more enjoyable. So there ya have it; I wouldn't change a thing. "If it ain't broke, don't fix it!"

This is going to be one busy stinkin' summer. Not only am I going to play baseball x amount of days a week, but I have to take a step out in to the real world. That means getting a job. Hopefully I find one soon; otherwise, I'll be spending my whole summer just looking for one. Job world, here I come.
I can't wait for the beach! I don't know how many times I'm going to go, but it's going to be a lot. I'm for sure going with Ricky, but maybe a couple times with my family too. I want to try to learn how to surf, but if that fails, I can always skimboard.
The most important thing I have to do this summer is relax. I love to ride four wheelers, so that's going to relax me. I'm definitely going to go fishing all the time. I'm going to hang out with friends all summer long. I'm going to live in the water and get a sweet tan. Come on Summer 2010!

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